Humour

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Lecture

A man is stopped by the police at midnight and asked where he's going.
"I'm on the way to listen to a lecture about the effects of alcohol and drug abuse on the human body."
The policeman asks, "Really? And who's going to give a lecture at this time of night?"
"My wife", he replied.
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NHS

The club secretary was visiting a fellow bowler in a brand new hospital, and asked about the place and things in general.  "The nurses are very good and so is the treatment" came the reply, "But the food gets a bit boring." What do you mean boring asked the secretary ?  Well we get "Haggis" for breakfast, "Haggis"for our lunch and then "Haggis"again for supper.  Well what do you expect says the secretary!  "THIS IS THE BURNS UNIT"
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High Spirits

Callum decided to call his father-in-law the "Exorcist" because every time he came to visit he made the spirits disappear!
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